May the Verse Be With You: Cold as the Worf Pole

"Come on now Worf,this is a time for joy;pull that cracker,you might find a toy""Have some turkey,maybe try roast goose?"

Ever since he first growled onto our screens in Star Trek: The Next Generation, in 1987, we’ve loved Worf (Michael Dorn). He’s Trek royalty now, after featuring prominently in Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. And the TNG films. What would Worf  think of Chrsitmas, if the crew were to celebrate it? Find out here! Worf’s speaking parts are in bold type in this week’s poem. Sounds about right, too . . .



“Come on now Worf,

this is a time for joy;

pull that cracker,

you might find a toy”


“Have some turkey,

maybe try roast goose?”

“No thanks, Captain,

I’ll stick with my prune juice”


“Don’t be a Scrooge

Worf. Won’t you try a hat?”

“Have mine, said Data”

“No. I will not try that”


“Today would be 

the perfect day to die

I so hate Christmas

Why can’t we have blood pie?”


“Loo over there,

beneath the Christmas tree

Go on, unwrap it”

“Ooh. Is that for me?


A Bat’leth! Yes! 

Check out its shiny blade! 

Okay. I admit

that’s my Christmas made!


“I’ll pull crackers;

wear daft hats like you fools,

eat dead roast birds

Like bat’leths, Christmas rules!”


All words by Benjamin Francis Cassidy

Illustration by L. A. Cassidy


There we have it: evidence of the true power of Christmas! It can even melt the heart of a fierce Klingon – Worf (well, it took a new Bat’leth). Who wouldn’t love to see Worf don a full Santa suit? This is the first of our seasonal specials at May The Verse Be With You. We’ll be on hand to keep you entertained each Friday in December. See all you wonderful readers next week for more festive fun!


2 Comments on this post.
  • Dominic Walsh
    12 December 2020 at 8:32 pm -

    Sir, I protest! I am not a merry man!

    • Ian Cullen
      14 December 2020 at 10:48 pm -

      Get thee back to Quonos.